Grateful Monday - Coworker Edition

Some of you may not find this to be a grateful post, an I understand that. But I need to vent and maybe even get some of your opinions on the matter. 

My gratefulness is that I think I am not this type of person, or I hope I'm not. And I'm also grateful to have this place to come to, vent, and get feedback from all of you lovely gals. 

With that said....

At my job we have supervisors, deputies and directors. That is the chain of command. On Thursday my supervisor was out and in the afternoon our deputy came over to where my friend and I sit. He asked her to go see him right before the end of her day and told me to go right before the end of my day (I get off 30 minutes after she does). 

My friend comes back after her meeting and warns me that the reason is that an accusation has been made. The deputy hadn't said the accusation was made against my friend... which meant it was probably against me. The person making the accusation is a known trouble maker. She is the type of person who very few people like. She is rude to people and acts as though she is God's gift to the planet. She brags about how great she is at everything she does and that she is the most knowledgable person around. She used to be in our unit, but they re-did the units almost a year ago and she was put in a different unit - however she didn't change cubicles. 

Guess where her cubicle is. Next to mine. We share a wall - a high one, so we don't see each other, but we can definitely hear each other. She is particularly loud so most people within 100 feet or so can hear her. She likes to get into other people's business. 

When I go into the deputy's office he tells me that this lady, let's call her V, accused me of "talking about bra sizes and breast feeding" as well as "making faces at her" which made her feel as she was being harassed. 

It was hard not to laugh when he told me this. I didn't though. I told him that it never happened. That I as not 5 and therefore did not make faces at people. I do smile, at everyone, at work - even the people I don't like. I told him that the last interaction I had was back in June when I got back from my honeymoon - I gave her a keychain from Argentina. 

He wanted me to sign something, but I refused without a Union Rep being with me. 

Apparently Internal Affairs will be involved and I will be interviewed regarding this. 

I plan on filing a complaint about her. This is not the first time that she has made a complaint against me. An unfounded ridiculous complaint. While I had not done anything after the first one - because I figured if she kept to herself I would, too - I feel that if I let this go it will just let her know that she can do whatever she wants and she'll get away with it. 

It amazes me how she can lie and make things up so easily. How she can try to put people down and make them out to be something they are not. How she can try and get people in trouble just because. 

So I'm thankful that I am not like her. That I don't go around trying to be mean to other people. Trying to ruin people's days. That's a good thing to be grateful for, right?

Stand Up Sunday - Week 3

This was a bit of world wind week. I joined the Biggest Loser at work. I'm on a team with 4 or 5 other people and we are competing against the other teams as well as other counties. They weighed me there, fully clothed and in the afternoon, at 163.8. 

Let’s get to the questions…

1.      How many pounds did you gain or lose?

I started the week at 161lbs. I ended at 159.8. A total loss of 1.2lbs.

2.      How many inches did you gain or lose?

I still haven’t measured myself… so nothing to add here!

3.      Your weekly exercise or step goal, and did you meet it?

Last week the number of steps that I took decreased, so I really worked hard to increase my steps this week. I’m proud of myself because on Wednesday I took Lance for a walk after work and when I was done with my usual route I was at about 8,000 steps. I thought that it was enough… but I pushed myself and made it to 9,905 steps by doing an extra walk around a block.

I walked a total of 54,726 steps.

(6,425 steps MORE than last week!)

4.      What was your biggest challenge this week?

This week was actually pretty easy. Thomas was out of town so I didn’t have to worry about making him dinner and making me something different within my calories. I did have issues with worrying about my weight loss/gain. I had a decent weekend, but I did have some excess on Sunday because of the Super Bowl. On Monday morning I weighed in at 163.6 (or so). I had no idea why I had gone up over 2 pounds in 2 days. Then, after eating lunch on Monday I figured it out – I had been eating cup of noodles for lunch. While they were within my calorie limits – they contain nearly 1200mg of sodium causing a lot of water retention! I cut the soup out and went back to my Lean Cuisine lunches and voila! I was back down to 161 on Wednesday and down to 159.8 on Friday. I hadn’t seen a 5 in a long time. I’ll eat soup, but I won’t have it several days in a row like I was doing (they are just SO good!).

5.      What is your favorite healthy snack or meal?

I discovered FiberOne soft baked bars a couple of weeks ago and bought a box of the peanut butter ones, then at Costco I saw gingerbread flavored ones. I love gingerbread. They are delicious and only 90 calories per bar. It’s not a huge bar, but it’s enough to satisfy a sweet craving. Yum!

6.      Do you have any advice or tips for the rest of us?

Push yourself! When you need to do that little extra to get to your goal, do it! It’s worth it in the end!

10 Awesome Things - Backstreet Style

In honor of the Backstreet Boys releasing their documentary “Show ‘Em What You Are Made Of” last week, I dedicate this month’s Awesome Things to them.

1. The Backstreet Boys have been around for over 20 years and have released 8 albums which have sold over 130 million copies – more than any other group (boy band) in history.

2. They are truly devoted to their fans. They host cruises every year that allow fans to get up close and personal with them. They stop to sign autographs whenever they can. They don’t spit on their fans. And when you do meet them they talk to you like they’ve known you forever and are a friend – not just like a “fan”.

3. Their music is amazing. Their voices harmonize incredibly well together and it can bring me up from a bad mood at any time.

4. Now my nearly 13 year old niece is obsessed with them – which is awesome. It’s a connection we have and we love to watch their videos together.

5. They are honest. They share their trials and tribulations with the public. From alcoholism and drug addictions, to loves and heart breaks, to vocal cord problems, they are open and honest with the fans – it makes a difference.

6. They made a movie/documentary that gives us an even broader view into their lives. The documentary was great, I loved it and can’t wait to see the extra footage when they release it.

7. They perform amazing concerts. From doing it in the round so that there were front row seats all around, to flying high above the fans and getting closer to the ones higher up in nose bleed seats. Their shows are never boring, the guys are moving the majority of the time – dancing their butts off. They do a capella songs and sing-alongs to keep the audience involved.

8. Now that they are on their own label and they get to choose which songs go on the albums and which don’t I’ve found that their songs have improved lyrically and performance wise. These songs matter to them and it shows in the songs themselves. They are also utilizing more of each of their talents instead of sticking to one or two lead singers.

9. They show the determination to keep performing and putting out music as long as the fans are around – which they will be if they continue to produce the music they do and stay true to the fan base.

10. I’m not big into music, I typically listen to talk radio in the car. I will like certain songs every now and then – but with them… I can be obsessed. The music, the performance, and the men themselves. It has been amazing to grow with them and see how they’ve changed and the things they’ve gone through. It is awesome that something that I’ve loved since I was 13 is still around now that I’m 30!

I Am Beautiful - Link Up

I wouldn’t say that I ever suffered from feeling ugly or fat as a teenager – the time where we all think is the hardest time for girls (and boys). I was in my own world with my group, I had no interest in being popular, I was happy where I was.

It’s been more evident as an adult that I have self-esteem issues that I should deal with.

Mine come not in the form of not being pretty or skinny enough (although I am trying to lose weight for my own good). It’s more so in what I say and do. I’ve always attributed to social anxiety – but many around me would argue that I don’t have that. They say I’m too friendly to have social anxiety.

Maybe I don’t, maybe it is just a self-esteem issue and calling it anxiety makes it sound better somehow?

Let me explain…

I am constantly worried about what others are thinking about me. Not about my looks, but about what I say and do. I feel that I am inadequate. I always say the wrong thing at the wrong time. I think it is founded in some cases, but in some I have to remind myself and they couldn’t care less about what I’m doing or saying.

It is definitely something that is a work in progress. Does anyone else have this “problem”?

Wednesday Wishes - Missing My Hubby

My husband is out of town this week and I miss him tremendously. I got to kiss him goodbye on Monday morning and he’ll be back in time to kiss me goodnight on Friday night, but I miss him very much each day in between.

My husband does say “I Love You” throughout the day when we are together, but sometimes does just feels like the same ‘ol same ‘ol. But on Monday I talked to my hubby while he was at the airport waiting for his flight and the first thing he said was “I’m already missing you, babe!”. It just tugs at my heart strings.

I can be a judgmental person and not believe the things he says, so sometimes I just brush it off as something he feels forced to say. But I have to remind myself that it’s not. He loves me and I know he misses me like I miss him (although I think it’s easier on the person who leaves than the one who stays).

While my husband will only be gone a few days and he only travels a few times a year for work, and at most 2 weeks at a time, there are so many husbands (and wives) out there that are gone for months and even years at a time in the military. Amber, over at Airing My Dirty Laundry, is currently doing the solo thing while her husband is deployed.

So my wish today is for the wives and husbands at home who have to do the job of mom and dad to their kids – I wish them a peaceful and stress-free time while their loved one is away. I wish their spouse returns soon to hug and kiss them good morning and good night. My wish for them is also to hold on to every “love you” or “miss you” that they receive – your spouse loves you and misses you too and can’t wait to get home to you!

Blogger Men Tell All (a week late!)

Even though I knew that this was coming up and I completely blew it. I had to edit this conversation because it included him saying inappropriate sexually motivated things. I admit it, but I'm not writing it. Here are his answers. 

1. What is your favorite memory with your blogger?
Umm, can you define what blogger means? Can you define what "my blogger" is? 
A blogger is a person who blogs, so I am a blogger. So I am your blogger. 
My favorite time with my blogger is when we were playing Minecraft and she got lost on top of a mountain and I saved her. 
Did this actually happen? 
No.
Can you share something that actually happened?
Our wedding day.

2. What is her best quality?

Having a cool temperament.

Are you being sarcastic.

Hahaha, would I be sarcastic about something like that.

Yes. 

Next question.

3. What is something the two of you enjoy doing together?

Eat food. 

That's your favorite thing for us to do together?

Ya.

4. What is your favorite post of hers that she has ever written?

Never read one.

5. How much time do you think your blogger puts into blogging each week? (And what are you normally up to when she’s blogging?) 

Probably 15 minutes and I am probably doing something important.

Meaning blogging isn't important.

I didn't say that.

Step Up Sunday (Week 2)

I think that I will start my posts with whatever random weight/eating thoughts are in my head and then move on to the questions.

So this week saw a lot of me wanting to each just for the sake of eating. I grew up eating no earlier than 7pm, sometimes as late as 9pm. In Argentina dinner time is 9 or 10pm (or even later). My family followed this for the most part.

My husband is an early eater. If he could, he would eat at 5pm. Unfortunately for him I get off work at 5:30 and I typically don’t get to work on dinner right away (even more so now that I tend to take the dog for a walk before I make him dinner).

I think that this is the problem, though. I am eating dinner before 7pm which is causing me to be hungry later in the evening and which also makes me antsy to want to munch on something. I did go ahead and pick up some low-cal snacks (Fiber One Brownies at the moment – 90 calories) so that helped a couple of nights.

Sometimes during day I also just want to chew on something or eat something. It’s hard to deal with these desires and keep on track calorie wise – but I’m trying to concentrate on drinking a lot of water and tea so not only keep my mind occupied but to keep something coming to my lips.

1. How many pounds did you gain or lose?

I started the week at 161lbs. I ended at 161lbs . A total loss/gain of nothing! 

2.  How many inches did you gain or lose?

I sort of feel like my size 10 pants are feeling a bit looser than last week, which I can imagine to not just be my imagination, 2.8lbs was probably water weight, but enough to loosen them up.

3.  Your weekly exercise or step goal, and did you meet it?

I walked a total of 47,301 steps.

(3,938 fewer steps than last week).

4. What was your biggest challenge this week?

As I mentioned above, my biggest challenge was not eating for the sake of eating. I had to refocus myself in the evenings to avoid munching. Not having bad snacks in the house helped to diffuse it as well. My other struggle, mentally, was that I weighed myself at 161.2 every single day from Sunday to Friday and it drove me crazy. I started moving the scale around to see if it made a difference (it didn’t).

5. What is your favorite healthy snack or meal?

I’ve been eating Yoplait Low-Fat yogurt as a snack at work daily. I’ve also been sticking to pork chops. Pork chops are tasty and also very lean. I sauté them with Saute Express and some beef broth and it is delicious. I’ll pair it with ¼ cup of couscous and saute a mixture of mushrooms and onions. I do add a bit of sugar to caramelize the onions, but just about a teaspoon or two for a batch that lasts me 3 meals. The whole thing is a total of 300 or so calories. If I add veggies it only increases it by 20-40 calories at most.

6. Do you have any advice or tips for the rest of us?

Going with my health meal for the week, I suggest buy fresh pork chips (I like the ones with bone more) and saute it. Delicious!